getting through those new baby blueS

I remember bringing home my son and being completely elated to finally have this little human here, in my home, for me to take care of.  My C-section recovery was a breeze. Breastfeeding was going well. After 4 days in the hospital living out of a suitcase I was ready to be home.   At about 3 weeks in, my husband had already gone back to work, my son started cluster feeding and that’s when I felt completely and utterly alone, unable to provide the most basic need for my child.  I was determined to make it work but through that whole process I felt anxious, exhausted, depressed, angry, resentful, among many many other emotions.  I was falling down a rabbit hole of hopelessness. I didn’t feel like myself and was lashing out at the people I love.  

 It was at that time that I started doing these 5 simple things to get myself out of that funk.

1. Take a shower, daily.

Don’t underestimate the power of a shower!  Refresh yourself. Get that sense of renewed life.  Plus, showering in the morning will help wake you up for the day ahead.  You don’t have anyone to watch the baby, no worries. Put him in the rocker or swing in the bathroom with you.  

2. Take some “me time”.

Whether you’re only “me time” is in the shower or sitting on the couch watching your favorite show, or simply sipping your morning coffee while the baby sleeps on his bouncer, ENJOY it.  At the beginning when this tiny creature is completely dependent on you, it’s so easy to forget that you are a person and need those same basic necessities.  Even if it’s just to nap for 15 minutes when daddy gets home from work.  Pass the baby along and take some time for you.

3. Move your body.

I don’t mean do a full workout. You’re not allowed to do that for 4-6 weeks. I mean just move. Do some light stretches.  Walk around your living room in circles.  Better yet, put the baby in a stroller and walk around the block.  Getting outside and walking will increase your mood, supply you with vitamin D, and improves sleep. 

4. Let the sunshine in.

If you can’t make it outside to enjoy a stroll in the sunlight, open up those windows.  Sunlight has been linked to reduce blood pressure, increase mood, lower appetite (helping you lose that baby weight), etc. Exposure to sunlight has so many health benefits and will make you feel more alert and awake. It will make you feel more like yourself. 

5. Listen to inspiring audio or read inspiring books.

This is something I started in the last 3 years.  I started with a book called “You are a Badass” by Jen Sincero. That book opened my eyes to personal development.  In my darkest moments, she taught me that I am in control of my life and I am worth so much more than I believed I was.  It’s so easy to throw ourselves a pity party when things aren’t going our way but listening or reading the words “you are enough” can be the very thing to get you out of your rut. 

6. Most importantly: Ask for help. 

No one expects you to do it alone. I remember sitting on my couch in the middle of the night while my husband slept in the bedroom. I remember feeling bad because he had to work and I would stay home all day with the baby.  I remember feeling completely and utterly alone.  I remember crying, by myself, struggling to get the baby back to sleep, struggling to get him to latch, struggling to stay awake so I didn’t drop him while he nursed. Most of all, I remember the feeling of resentment.  Ladies, taking care of a newborn ALL DAY LONG is a full time job.  The reality is, I wasn’t sleeping when the baby slept because my body was conditioned to be awake during the day. I physically couldn’t fall asleep but was so completely exhausted from the nursing, and the holding, and the pumping, that I literally didn’t have time or energy to make myself a meal.  Don’t allow yourself to go through that alone.  You have a partner. That’s what they are there for.  Sometimes you make it seem like you’re good and they really have no idea that you need help.  Ask for help. 

These tips helped me get through those very dark days and helped me enjoy that short time  of infancy. It is amazing how fast the days go by when your child is small and those moments, while difficult, need to be enjoyed because you’ll never get them back.